there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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