i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
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