It's Friday. Sex?
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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