i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
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Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
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So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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