yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize