dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Randomize