Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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