You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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