No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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