Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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