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Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
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