I feel great
I just peed on a car
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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