If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize