He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
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