just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize