My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Randomize