I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
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