Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

brad dismisses pussy with prejudice

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(248): brad dismisses pussy with prejudice http://tfl.nu/6yt6

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(516): View more from New York

I hate all girls vehemently.

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(516): I hate all girls vehemently. http://tfl.nu/rhf8

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(905): View more from Toronto

I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it

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(905): I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it http://tfl.nu/jng0

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(304): View more from West Virginia

i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.

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(304): i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me. http://tfl.nu/6um2

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(985): View more from Louisiana

I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.

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(985): I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies. http://tfl.nu/mtcu

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(913): View more from Kansas

I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day

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(913): I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day http://tfl.nu/fmap

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(860): View more from Connecticut

i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow

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(860): i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow http://tfl.nu/61vx

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(870): View more from Arkansas

He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."

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(870): He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed." http://tfl.nu/z9xx

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(540): View more from Virginia

Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up

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(540): Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up http://tfl.nu/xh5q

Replies (18) Good night (990) Bad night (2561)
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(714): View more from California

You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.

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(714): You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world. http://tfl.nu/6m84

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(317): View more from Indiana

Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.

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(317): Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina. http://tfl.nu/djvg

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(254): View more from Texas

That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.

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(254): That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it. http://tfl.nu/3la0

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(562): View more from California

So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.

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(562): So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now. http://tfl.nu/6kpj

Replies (17) Good night (569) Bad night (1996)
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(714): View more from California

Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.

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(714): Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to. http://tfl.nu/rk2y

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(616): View more from Michigan

sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.

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(616): sex on the stairs. not our finest idea. http://tfl.nu/6x8t

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