considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
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