He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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