Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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