A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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