you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize