idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
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Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
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