thus making me awesome and them whores
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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