She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
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Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
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Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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