He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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