his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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