How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize