i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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