people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
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My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
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Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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