I accidentally burped into my bong.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize