im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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