and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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