p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize