So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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