I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
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he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Watching her eat just hurts me
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It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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