Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?

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(412): Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went? http://tfl.nu/2c9n

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(773): View more from Illinois

the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu

(773): View more from Illinois

which is why it's clearly superior

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(773): the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu (773): which is why it's clearly superior http://tfl.nu/iahv

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(718): View more from New York

Barsexuality is the new black.

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(718): Barsexuality is the new black. http://tfl.nu/lc2j

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(703): View more from Virginia

im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one

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(703): im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one http://tfl.nu/hfte

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(704): View more from North Carolina

My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college

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(704): My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college http://tfl.nu/somi

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(323): View more from California

dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning

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(323): dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning http://tfl.nu/bjxg

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(716): View more from New York

is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?

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(716): is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex? http://tfl.nu/cm27

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(206): View more from Washington

dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.

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(206): dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement. http://tfl.nu/2u7j

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(440): View more from Ohio

my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.

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(440): my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement. http://tfl.nu/zd8a

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(303): View more from Colorado

Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.

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(303): Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life. http://tfl.nu/utnc

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(908): View more from New Jersey

Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?

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(908): Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good? http://tfl.nu/2d9n

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(785): View more from Kansas

totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted

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(785): totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted http://tfl.nu/rzdq

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(760): View more from California

The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter

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(760): The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter http://tfl.nu/uanv

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety

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(401): I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety http://tfl.nu/pik8

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.

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(402): I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that. http://tfl.nu/01r4

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