Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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