never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
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