What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
My vagina is officially offended.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Randomize