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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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