I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize