I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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