But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
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Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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