she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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