I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize