Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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