3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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