the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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